Sunday, July 15, 2012

Severe Chronic Pain Sufferer: My Experience Making the Decision to Quit Opioids

After 11 years, I made the decision to stop taking pain medications, as part of my pain management plan, almost a year ago.
I hadn't really made a commitment to quit till one day I heard the voice of The Heavenly Father telling me to and reassuring me that I could do it! There were other deciding moments: I had grown sick and tired licking the inside of my pill bottle because I ran out and had to wait a week or more for a refill! (yes, I've done this so many times before) I actually grew to hate the person I had become. And because I didn't want a second visit to the mental institution I knew I had to follow through.
When I informed my son he was also extremely supportive. He shared with me that I was an addict and was embarrassed, for years. My husband wasn't so sure but said it was my decision and he would support me. I really needed everyone on board because I knew there would be times of weakness, on my part.
My Withdraws were horrible! But everyday...every moment I had the Lord and my family telling me this wasn't going to last forever and they would continue to support me. Marcus would come hold my hand and tell me to focus on the moment instead of the day. I can't express how much that helped me. I actually use that to endure my 9+ pain days. My husband was there to clean me up after I repeatedly sweat through my clothes, threw up or loss my bowels.
My pain management doctor kept me on anti-depressants and muscle relaxers but no more opioids.
After several months, of quitting, I noticed I was much stronger for going through it. For me, this was the right decision. I'm feeling more focused and enjoying things. ( a big improvement) I haven't had a migraine in over a year, my daily pain level is around an '8' instead of a 9+ and I'm now pursuing a healthier diet and lifestyle!
I still get the urge for a pain pill from time to time but it's getting less frequent and the moment doesn't last long.

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